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eclecticz

what a brain

7/27/07 04:01 pm

7/27/07 09:30 am

once in a life
things look grey
everyday the same
pain doesnt go away

once in a life
the sun finally shines
burdens lift
only for a short time

once in a life
the blackness does come
when the rock falls
where do you run

once in a life
you make a choice
how will it be
hopefully the sun

8/17/06 08:36 pm - jesus-the remix


Anyone who was around last halloween knows of Jesus and The Nun and their escapades. What a night. Love you Tiff and Amanda!

8/17/06 09:27 am - Cat Shit

Not funny for me, but I'm sure a couple of you will appreciate it.

I have a water fountain for the cat water. It runs it through a cooling mechanism so the cat has cold water. When it gets low, it starts to "gasp" because of the air pockets. I was having a nightmare about being stuck on a railroad with a dead car. Everytime I would turn the engine in my dream it just made a weird noise. When I woke up, the gasps of the waterer were synched to my attempts to start my car. This was about 3:30 this morning. On my way back to bed, I step in cat shit! Oh yeah, the kind that goes between your toes. It wasn't a lot. My cat is long-haired so I assume there was some left after she used the litter box. Not exactly what I wanted to be doing at the ass-crack of dawn.

8/16/06 10:32 pm - juggernaut


Bright spot in my day. AHH YOUR IN MY HEAD CHARLES!

8/16/06 06:32 pm - been a while, eh.

I haven't posted in ages.
Guess there comes a time to vent and be emotional. I like to play a hard-ass at work bossing people around and even out. I know what I want but no idea how to get it. I know what I want to do with my life, I know what kind of a man I want/need. Neither matters. I work for Wal-Mart and have been single for nearly three years now.

I live by myself with Meow, my new non-human animal companion. I sit around reading or watching TV. Nooone ever calls, noone but my mom, stepfather, and brother have even seen my apartment. I have lots of online friends. I'm not sure how to make or keep them in real life. At some point, in every relationship/friendship, we just stop talking. I don't know if I am too boring or to eccentric. I don't guess it matters really.

I told all my MySpace friends to add my LJ mostly because its easier to post here than post a blog.

So, I bought a couch so people could come over. I cleaned as best as I could so it would be so fresh and so clean, but now I don't think I want anyone over. I think I am crazy, but how would I explain what I think to anyone. I know what I think, but vocalizing it is a completely different story.

I'm sorry I'm a downer today. Tomorrow will be bright and cheery, but today is dull!

much love
peace.love.justice.

2/23/06 09:30 pm - Crazy...

Is how I feel right now.

To start the week I took my cat to the Humane Society. I am moving in w/ my g-ma who won't let me have him. I made a big donation and luckily there was an old lady there who said she would come get him when the three day quarantine was up. I'm going to call tomorrow to see how he is. I feel horrible, but I know he will be fine. I cried all day. Some people may think I am shallow or whatever, but you don't understand. I felt like that is what I had to do. I feel he will be better off. I wasn't able to give him the attention and love he needed when he was my companion.

I skipped English today to go talk to my granny about moving day and upgrading my cell phone. Well I go to Cingular. Argue for about an hour and it turns out since my line is on a corporate account tand they have a discount I can't upgrade in a store. She has to call some 800 number and do it. Ughh I wanted that damn SLVR today!!!!!!

A good friend of mine, and my former boss(we still work together) was fired yesterday. I was off yesterday. So I feel bad for him but theres not much I can do. Things are crazy at work too. It is official that Wal-Mart is probably the most evil corporation on Earth.

My roommate won't talk to, or even be in the same room with me. Probably because I took the cat without telling her. She was trying to get someone who lives by us to take him. They kept flip-flopping and I didn't want to keep waiting only to find out he had nowhere to go. If I am hated, so be it. I'm only here another couple days. My landlord is going to take my name off the lease the 10th regardless of whether someone moves in or not. Once I'm gone its not my problem anymore.

Love ya'll
peace.love.justice.

2/22/06 02:20 pm - Interesting Topic #1

As I go through some of these topics day-to-day keep in mind the statements are only my opinion. I will always try to recognize both sides of an argument as credible and then give my position. ALL opinions are respected.

So the first thing I want to talk about is something near and dear to my heart. Animals. I will open with a quote from His Holiness the Dalai Lama:
"All sentient beings have a right to life. It is obvious that mammals, birds, and fish all feel pleasure and pain, and that therefore they do not like pain any more than we do. When we abuse animals simply for a profit motive, even if we leave the Buddhist point of view aside, such action contradicts elementary moral values." -The Dalai Lama

OK, as most of you on my list are meat-eaters I will try my best not to preach. As far as I'm concerned it is absurd to think that killing any living, breathing, feeling thing for food is any way justifiable. We have plenty of alternative to take the place of flesh that is every day of our live tossed in front of us as if we're some crazed cannibalistic hyena. In the beginning of mankind we were all vegan. For many many thousands of years humans only ate fruits, nuts, leaves, etc. There were no tools or weapons to take down animals. They obviously lived well enough on that kind of diet to procreate and continue this species. So that argument lots of folks like to throw at me, "Humans were meant to eat meat." is irrelevant. Animals who eat other animals have a special kind of tooth right? Fangs, to puncture vessels and kill prey. Animals that don't eat other animals do not have these special teeth do they? Are humans born with fangs? No. The same goes for stomach and digestive system. it can take up to a week for your body to digest and pull all the nutrients(of which, there are few) out of meat. It literally rots in your colon. Nowadays animals are crammed into farms, chicken houses, and underwater crates for what? A big corporation to make another dollar. Thats what the cruelty boils down too. The government doesn't care because it makes them rich too. Is it worth it to sacrifice? It may be convenience, or the feeling of need, or nurture that makes you eat meat. But whatever it is it makes you a person without compassion for all. Without compassion for everything you can never be happy yourself. Millions of acres of ground are used to grow grain to feed cows that are to be slaughtered. The same amount of food could feed Africa's dying hungry population. If we didn't eat all the cows we could use the land for other foods. To keep humans alive. America is the worst of all. We sit back and have everything handed to us. Not knowing where it comes from or how it got there. Most of all not caring. As long as it clogs a few more millimeters of artery and causes a little more congestive heart failure we're ok with it. We shouldn't be.

I'll leave you with this and can make your own conclusions.
"Of all the various species of animal on the planet, human beings are the biggest troublemakers. That is clear. I imagine that if there were no more humans on the planet, the planet itself would be much safer. Certainly millions of chickens, fish, and other small animals might enjoy some sort of genuine liberation!"
-Dalai Lama

peace.love.justice.

2/22/06 09:39 am - Updated.

I updated my pics, user info, blah blah blah. Now I need to start writing in this blasted thing. I guess some interesting topics may come up. Tell ur friends to add me!!!
MUAH

2/15/06 10:11 pm - Rant, rant, rant~!!

I haven't updated in a while so what better way to revive this space with a soapbox session about what pisses Zack off.
-Mothers with 5+ children on welfare still allowed to reproduce.
I am working to buy them food, provide housing, medical care, etc. DON'T GET ME WRONG. I know programs are in place to help those who need it. Too often I see people milking the system. People living in gov't housing with five kids living on food stamps, wic, etc. Someone should stop being so free with our tax money. Jobs are available. If I could live at home and pop out babies and make 3g's a month don't think I wouldn't. It seems those people lose any self-respect. They are CONTENT living that way! Why? Why would you be content living off the government earning nothing for yourself?
-People who always feel sorry for themselves.
I'm sure you all know at least one person like this. No matter how good things can be going in their lives, they have it so horrible. GET THE FUCK OVER YOURSELF!!! Babies in Africa are dying every minute from starvation and AIDS. I doubt either of those are on your mind. We take too many things for granted. What is so horrible in your life is your inability to gain unnecessary wants. We as Americans think we deserve more than we do. All humans are entitled to the same basic things. Water, food, shelter of which we ALL have in the states. Everything else is trivial. Think of more than yourself. Sadly, people like this have no idea that you are referring to them. Most of the time they agree and point out someone who feels sorry for themselves. Quick to shift blame.
-Big business.
Corporations are taking over the world. Big companies have taken over all the small, local farmers, store owners, our neighbors. They bring cheaper items from overseas. Most made in China, whose economy is booming by the way, where labor and material is inexpensive. Is it worth lost American jobs, poor quality, and destruction of our environment? I don't think so.
All of these things are things I tihnk about EVERY day among many others. Things people push to the back of their heads so they can have an uninterupted day as just another soul doing what they are told when they are told to do so. Aren't we as humans able to comprehend these ideas? Do we not deserve to chang OUR world for the better? Of course we do. The question then lies in our willingness to get off our FAT LAZY ASSES and do it!!
Thank You and Goodnight!

1/8/06 08:51 pm - today

did laundry. rented some movies. watched said movies. went with kristy to meet meagan at charlies mongolian. in the process got snotted on. came home. so far so good.

12/28/05 11:39 pm - hate IM's like all geniuses get...

SOme person IMed me at random a few minutes ago with these kind words to say..............ahh isn't free speech great.

MelissaGal44m: just thought I'd let you know how evil u are
eclecticjzw: do u mind to elaborate/
MelissaGal44m: your abortion outfit
eclecticjzw: oh yeah. Should've guessed...
MelissaGal44m: that is the nastiest most disgusting most insensitive thing I have seen in a long long time
eclecticjzw: I guess now u have. It may be disgusting and insensitive but it does happen in home bathrooms across america
MelissaGal44m: why?
MelissaGal44m: it is legal!
MelissaGal44m: no reason to cover it up
eclecticjzw: when young girls are forced by their state law to tell their parents it causes irrational behavior. I'm not going to try to defend what I do and say. You don't like it don't look at it. Tell me I'm going to hell, I'm alreayd purchasing a handbasket.
MelissaGal44m: wow
MelissaGal44m: forcing young girls who should not be having sex to begin with to inform their parents of their medical condition.................thats insane!
eclecticjzw: I'm not going to argue all night. I wore a costume with a dead baby that happened to have a hanger in his eye. Had to get out somehow. Whatever. You have the right to IM me just as I have a right to wear what I please. Have a good night. GOD BLESS YOU.




hmmm makes me think nice thoughts. old right wing ladies. shes quite the hoot to chat with. 44 yo white lady. imagine that.

12/27/05 11:42 pm - i got artsy today...warm weather and all

I took some pictures


I decided to get creative today. I bought a black and white disposable camera and took these pics~!! Tell if me if their decent or shit. It's my first attempt at photography but I had loads of fun doing it.

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
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Image hosted by Photobucket.com


Heres the link to the album. U can check out the rest of them. I got lazy and didn't want to upload them!!

http://photobucket.com/albums/a179/eclecticz/Artsy/

peace.love.justice.

12/9/05 12:19 am



What Famous Leader Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

12/5/05 11:09 pm - Ikea, Meat, Hmm Whatever~!!

If you lookin fo me I'll be on the block with my thang cocked possibly sittin on a drop now!!!

So, I got the IKEA catalog today!!! FUCKIN AWESOME!!!! Every page is somethin different and exciting!!!! WOWOWOWOWOWOWOW!!! U should get one if u haven't already. www.ikea.com

I went grocery shopping with Kristy tonight. I am becoming extremely disturbed and disgusted and saddened when I go to the store anymore. I see Lobsters in an empty tank. Waiting to be boiled alive. Pigs feet, cow tongue, baby lamb shoulder. I can't stand the thought of it. What is wrong with me. I really don't want to care anymore. Why can't I be a couture catty bitch like all the other fags?

Life is difficult right now. I am going through a lot of changes and the holidays are here which sucks that much more. My grandpa and my great grandma died this year so Xmas will be weird.

I get to go to the urologist to have a knot checked out which has tripled in size since the last visit!! Woo hoo!!

ok I guess I'm done for now!!
peace.love.justice.

10/24/05 03:13 pm - Lots o' shit!!

Hmm so things have finally settled down a bit. I am working two jobs right now. Wal-Mart and a kiosk in the mall!!! It pays the bills but I am sooo ready for school!! I have decided to contact PETA and ask them to help me set up a demo outside Roberts Stadium protesting the Circus and their inhumane treatment of the animals!!! Elephants should be in Africa not Evansville!! Any animal loving friends feel free to show up!! Umm I have some awesome new friends since I moved to E-ville. Kristy, Amanda, Tiffany and a few others!!! Well I am going to get a haircut now!!! I will finally start to update this thing regularly!!! peace.love.justice.

8/13/05 07:33 pm - The Cage!!

Ok so were almost ready for another party Saturday!! We're gonna load up here in a bit and make our way to Owensboro to get our groove on at The Cage!! 18 to enter 21 to drink!! A couple guys from the real world/ road rules (www.issfmevansville.com)will be there!! SO if anyone is game and shows up be sure to holla at ya boy!!!
peace.love.justice.

2/21/05 02:38 pm - Job, B-Day`

First I would like to wish Amanda Stone a very happy 19th birthday!!

So I got a call form the HR Manager at Lazarus-Macys today. I have an interview on Wednesday morning. Wish me luck.

Umm guess thats about all for today. peace

2/20/05 05:45 pm - Hmm Bitch Session. Don't be offended.

Innately, humans are insecure with themselves. A very limited number of people realize this and work to overcome it. Looking from where I stand, this insecurity explains the fascination with many of our “cultures” practices. The media does not help this any. Portraying pencil thin women as the ideal body shape, glorifying hunting and man-on-man violence. We need to feel in control, on top, in charge. Many American men hunt. We all know that in this day in age it is not for food. Rather as sport. To bring home the biggest buck or the largest turkey. It is a trophy that says “look what I did with my time, I stole a life.” When you are in a tree stand or a hiding in a duck blind you feel superior. They have no defense against you. YOU are in control of whether they live or die. You can finally be the all powerful being you so longingly desire. Does this make you more of a man? Absolutely not. Does this somehow overshadow the incompetency you feel in your life, whether it be financially, sexually, emotionally? Of course. As logical humans we should be able to see that spending time hunting out those weaker than us is unacceptable. If you want to hunt fine, but make sure your target is equipped with a 22 as well. Make sure they have an equal chance at taking you out and hanging your head on a wall. THINK. Thats why many claim we are different from the animals. How much different are you really? Think about it the next time you eat a hamburger. Would you eat the person working the counter at any one burger joint? Would you eat your dog or cat? What makes them so different? This logic makes one breed of animal inferior to another. Seeing as how we aren’t that different form animals wouldn’t it be safe to say that this thinking can lead some to believe that there are second-class humans as well? Are all lives not equally important? Why do we do this to ourselves, our neighbors, our world? How barbaric are we as a race to still dwell on the flesh or dead organisms? Are we not, as a superior, intelligent race, above this? Aren’t we smart enough to realize our practices are outdated? As well as unhealthy? What about milk and milk products? How many other species do you know of that drink milk after they are weaned? None. Milk is provided by mothers to their young for nourishment. After they are old enough to eat solids what is the point of having milk? Why are we so obsessed with meat and dairy? We were smart enough to create alternatives why not utilize them as well? Come on. I hate to preach but isn’t enough enough? THINK
peace.love.justice. FOR ALL!!!!!!

10/31/04 06:01 pm - Murray!!

So I'm back from Murray! What a night. I got there at around 6 and visited for a while then got drunk. We went to a party with all kinds of hot drunk boys. YAY!! Well, the guy I was visiting kept grabbing my crotch while we were dancing, needless to say it pissed me off. I guess he thought it wouldn't matter if I was drunk. I took all kinds of pictures. I wonder if anyone will develop the ones where everyone is flashing? We'll see... Well I stayed in the same guys dorm last night only to wake up and he was trying to take my clothes off. I just played it off and told him I wanted to sleep. I woke up early, got my shit and left. But I left my vanilla vodka, and 2 bottles of white rum there :( Was I wrong to leave before he woke up? I guess I'll soon decide. It's not worth it. 2 days until election day!! Who's excited? I AM !! Help is on the way. Isn't it funny that 4 days before the election Bush tried to sway the gay vote by saying he supports civil unions, but not marriage? He thinks the Republican Party should support civil unions. WHATEVER!!! What a hangover. I had to stop like 20 times on the way home to puke. Well hope everyone had a great Halloween. See ya for thanksgiving!!!!!!!
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